Why I Fucked Eva Jane In Her Ass

Having been fucked with by a certain control freak limey, I feel it is obligatory that I respond by explaining how I fucked his girlfriend in the ass. It was last weekend at a concert festival.

Okay, now that he's tuned out, we can talk about real brass tacks without fearing a Bono poseur's nosy interference. I was actually at a music festival this weekend, and can state the following with triple confirmed surety:

1. Folk music is dead.
2. Communism has been coopted by careerist motherfuckers.
3. Free love is a stupid slogan good only for selling junk to old hippies.
4. Heroin is Mankind's greatest achievement.

Explanations:

Folk music is supposed to be the natural expression of a people cut off from the global community, or as uppity people like to say, regionally isolated, which communicates a faithful sense of their development as an organic community.

Unfortunately, "folk music," is a stupid slogan good only for selling junk to old hippies.

Communism is supposed to be a collective struggle against the aristocratic power of the bourgeoisie, so that their historically lapsed control over the hearts and minds of the global citizenry can be put to an end. Instead, communism is little more than the establishment of job security for the phoniest cocksuckers ever to graduate from institutions of "higher" learning, and has absolutely nothing to do with the dictatorship of the proletariat over the peasantry.

In short, "communism" is a stupid slogan, good only for selling dumb fucks on thinly disguised anarcho-capitalism.

Free love does not exist, as love no longer exists, extinguished as it was by greedy careerist fucks running around feeling superior to everyone their sloganised movements is supposed to be ameliorating.

Heroin, invented in Germany in the late 1800s, is man's greatest invention. Now the true Marxists can't complain about religion being the opiate of the masses, because thanks to an unprecedented, illegal invasion of Afghanistan, we are responsible for providing those same masses with the most potent, cheapest replacement for God available, at the mere cost of a trillion tax dollars and thousands of innocent lives.

What it took revolutionaries years to minimise, not eradicate, by armed insurrection has taken the American government a mere five years to accomplish. Thanks to them, and Canada's willingness to sacrifice its soldiers to protect their Afghani grow operation, they have become the most godless bunch of confused fucks in the world in mere months.

So why am I complaining? Oh, I just hate hypocrisy, don't mind me. You'll just ignore all that moral stuff anyway on your way to trample everyone else in your stampede toward the middle. And that is why you make me retch.